Still Married After All These Years

I’m having an anniversary today, though not really, with the groom in Chicago for a few days.

It’s  OK I guess. We don’t mark days like this the way the greeting card people would have us do. Giving someone a card just because it’s, like, Grandmother’s Day seems to me like forcing a person to tell you he loves you: all the real feeling drains right out of the thing.

On our first anniversary in the great era of Bobby Orr Boston, we took ourselves out to celebrate at a joint set up in the old Allston Depot, designed by the great H.H. Richardson.

We couldn’t afford much but we ordered a drink apiece and some appetizers. The Clams Casino turned out to have a piece of glass in it so the manager gave us two more drinks, on the house.

That made us sure-enough giddy, kids that we were. I could almost forget I had to teach five classes the next day. David could almost stop remembering he had that crucial paper do for ‘gradual’ school, as one of Garp’s kids calls it in the John Irving novel.

Fun to think back and isn’t that  the beauty of a blog! The way I can just write what I feel day to day.

It’s so much fun I sometimes feel I’m running some sort of scam here –except of course I don’t charge for it. I don’t have ads or links to the Aren’t I Great page that embarrasses me every time I look at it.

I tried to make it a writer of books but I was just one person.  Now I don’t care about  all that.

I guess if we’re lucky we kind of turn back into the simple people we were at the beginning.

On those early anniversaries we were kids still, still  jumping out from behind doors to scare each other, still throwing cups of icy water onto the other guy in the shower.

I guess we still do some of that, come to think of it. My own favorite trick is still to sneak the shower door open when David is in there and just sort of stand there – not IN the shower stall but just outside it. Just stand there, expressionless.

He doesn’t know I’m there for the longest time because he has his eyes squeezed shut against the sting of the shampoo– until suddenly he opens them and there I am with the zombie face.  He jumps a mile, every time.

So here’s a picture of us on  Anniversary Number 25. That night we ate at Legal Sea Food with my sister Nan and my cousin Eleanor, both visiting from out of town.

Our children gave us two kittens who made things lively around here for the next dozen years.

That dress was from Costco and cost $19.95. I still have it around here somewhere.

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18 thoughts on “Still Married After All These Years

  1. Congratulations, Terry on your 42nd anniversary! That is a real accomplishment today to be married to the same person for all these years and to be still in love! — Elaine Natsios Patsourakos

  2. Ah, yes. You show how much laughter and impishness keeps a good relationship alive.

    John and I just had out 56th — with me here in California tending to a daughter who just underwent surgery. On our first anniversary we also were separated, courtesy of the US Marine Corps. Years do pass…

  3. Terry,
    We are unusual in our long marriages. Seems that we are the last ones on the dance floor at weddings these days. Congratulations on your day. I remember the original day all too well!
    Dave Talbot

  4. I like “all too well” (!) Wait did you SEE me spill that sloe gin fizz all down my gown? Gosh we were young. 21 I was with no more of an idea bout gin than the man in the moon …. Thanks for this Dave

  5. Hi Terry, Happy anniversary. It seems that a lot of neat things happen in the first month of this, my favorite season. Tomarrow, I will have accumulated 53 of these Summers and I couldn’t agree with you more. Simpler is best. We/I have been attempting to streamline our lives and environments as of late. We are selling the big house hopefully this year and starting another chapter in our lives. Scary but seemingly the right thing to do. I hope that I am one of the “lucky” ones that you write of. Take care, CJH

    1. well I missed the chance to wish you happy birthday last week but I hope it was a great day for you. I salute you for streamlining too my gosh. You have courage I lack.
      What was it Thoreau said? “simplify! Simplify!”

  6. Happy Anniversary, Terry…we celebrate 46 years on Monday…and it’s been a strong shot of “in sickness and in health” the past few days as I play Nurse Nancye to John after his emergency hernia surgery on Sunday…life throws these wrenches at us time and again…but the humor makes it bearable….
    Take care,
    Nancye Tuttle

  7. Hap…Hap…Happy Anniversary. I remember joining you in the front of that dimly lit Catholic church, presumably in Lowell. Ruth was pleased. Her father and mother had been married in Concord N.H. on June 21 in 1911. Cal and Grace presided over a lively reception in the backyard of their home. Then off you two went, back to Cambridge and on to B-School. That inlaid Indian coffee table that went to live with you still sits in the front room of Up House!

  8. Happy 25th Anniversary! You still look very much in love. Scaring Dave in the shower must keep him young. What’s your excuse? Glad that you were able to share your special day with sister, family and friends. Thanks for sharing. Gwen Talbot

  9. Well massage woman –

    I cheer you on for a new aniversity for many years to come. This country loves to get M but also loves to get to get D and in the middle called S (simple), we survive.

    Congrats

    RLS

    1. You witty guy Richard!
      It’s been a long time since anyone called me anything related to my six years in massage. what a great chapter that was huh? what good and abiding things we learned!

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